or I could vote for Howard Dean

Democracy is a responsibility. It is incumbent on the voters, the people, to inform themselves about the merits of each candidate. In an effort to help busy folks make educated decisions, I've included this candidate statement from Vermin Supreme, as written in the District of Columbia Voters Guide:

Vermin Supreme, a friendly fascist, a tyrant you can trust. Let him run your life. He knows what’s best for you. Proper dental hygiene is essential to proper social order. “Effective use of tarter control will prevent the need for crowd control later.”

-Gingivitis has been eroding the gum line of this great nation of ours long enough and must be stopped!

For too long this great nation of ours has been suffering a great moral and oral decay in spirit and incisors. A country’s future depends on its ability to bite back. We can no longer be a nation indentured, our very salivation is at stake. Therefore we must brace ourselves, bite the bullet, and now more than ever, as we hurdle forward over the bridgework into the twentythird century, may we become together a nation of gleaming smiles from sea to shining sea. THROUGH WHATEVER MEANS NECESSARY. DO NOT BE FOOLED BY FALSE TEETH PROPHETS!

This law is not about:

Dental commando squads or warrantless random no knock dental inspections.
Government issued toothpaste containing addictive yet harmless substances.
Video surveillance through two way bathroom mirrors.
Electronic tracking, moisture and motion sensor devices in all toothbrushes.
Novelty floss dispensers.
Dental re-education center.
Gene splicing to create a race of winged monkeys to act as tooth fairies.
Computer chip dental implants with laser scanners at all toll booths and supermarkets.
The fluoridation of every beverage or even preventative dental maintenance detention facilities.

What this mandatory toothbrush law is really about is:

STRONG TEETH FOR A STRONG AMERICA.

Gingivitis has been eroding the gum line of this great nation of ours long enough and must be stopped!

All politicians are vermin. I am Vermin Supreme. I shall lie to you, because I can. I will Promise anything and deliver nothing. I am the peoples' candidate, you are the people.

TOGETHER, WE CAN TURN UP THE BRIGHTNESS KNOB, OF THE FUTURE, TOMORROW, TODAY.